Marks of Maturity: Whose Responsibility Is the Overboard Passenger?

Marks of Maturity: Whose Responsibility Is the Overboard Passenger?

This past Sunday marked the conclusion of our Marks of Maturity sermon series (did you see what I did there?). Our seventh and final sermon focused on Persevering to the End. You can listen to the sermon here if you missed it or want to share it. 

Pastor Tim’s sermon made me think about our church’s inactive list. This is a list of members who have not recently worshipped. Periodically, pastors and elders will reach out to missing members by letter, email, or phone call. Here’s an example of an email we have sent in the past:

Dear Friend in Christ, 

We’re reaching out because, according to our attendance records, we haven’t seen you in worship for a while. 

The normal habit of a healthy, growing disciple of Jesus Christ is to gather regularly with other Christians to hear God’s Word, receive the Lord’s Supper, and enjoy fellowship, encouragement, and accountability. 

When someone is missing from worship, it’s the responsibility of pastors and elders to reach out. This is what Jesus commands us to do, and this is part of why we belong to a church—to encourage and care for one another.

• Perhaps you were in worship, but we missed you? (Be sure to register your attendance with us through the church app or Connection Cards).

• Perhaps you’ve experienced a crisis or difficulty in your life? 

• Maybe you’ve just gotten distracted or out of the habit of worship, and the Holy Spirit is using this message as a gentle invitation to reconnect with worship?

• Maybe you have moved, or you are attending another church? 

Whatever the case may be, we are praying for you by name. We’d love to hear back from you, and most of all, we hope to see you soon.

You are loved in Christ, 

The Pastors and Elders of Holy Cross 

Sometimes we get no response. Other times, we receive a request for membership transfer or release. Occasionally, we learn that a member needs to be added to our monthly visitation list. And sometimes, missing members will return to worship and remain in worship. It just took a little Spirit-led tap on the shoulder to restore fellowship. I cannot tell you how much joy I feel when I see a member or family reconnected with the Word, the Sacrament, and the fellowship of God’s people. 

Yet, as much joy as I feel at the one sheep returning to the ninety-nine, this is a big job. Pastors and elders struggle to keep up with the inactive list of a large congregation. There are just too many other things to do alongside seeking missing members. This is one important part of pastoral work among many other parts. 

During Pastor Tim’s sermon, I thought to myself, “If someone fell out of a boat, would everyone just look at one another and assume someone else would do the rescuing?” Probably not. The rescue would be a group effort, not just the job of one person. Furthermore, there would be both a sense of urgency to execute the rescue in a timely manner and a sense of joy and celebration once the rescue was accomplished. 

I wonder what it would look like for our congregation to see our inactive members list more like passengers who have fallen out of a boat than just people who are missing. If we really believe that someone’s faith will wither apart from the Word, the Sacrament, and the fellowship of God’s people, we will treat missing members with more urgency and will respond with more of a group effort. 

Consider the words of Hebrews 3:13, one of our readings this past Sunday:

But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. 

The writer to the Hebrews is not speaking specifically to pastors. He’s speaking to the whole congregation. Who is called to exhort and encourage others to remain faithful to Christ? Each and every member of the congregation.

So, while it is important for the pastors and elders of Holy Cross to periodically reach out to missing members, it’s actually more biblical, timely, and in some cases more personal and effective for members to reach out to one another. 

Think about it. If every active member of Holy Cross took a few minutes to call or text another member who is missing, the entire list of missing members would have been contacted in just a few minutes. At first, this might feel weird or intrusive. But really, it’s just the level of care and connection we’re called to have with one another. It’s what we signed up for as members of our congregation. Also, this is a sign of a healthy, maturing congregation. And finally, it’s one of the primary ways the Lord helps us persevere to the end. 

So, after reading this email, who are you going to contact? It doesn’t need to be complicated. It’s as simple as “Hey! How have you been? I’ve missed seeing you at church. Is everything OK?”

Now, of course, this shouldn’t be creepy. Holy Cross isn’t a cult. Anyone is free to leave at any time (although it’s really nice when people tell us they’re leaving instead of ghosting, which sadly seems to be a growing trend). It’s common for people to leave, just as it’s common for people to connect, but it’s just really kind when we know where they went and if they’re connected to another church. 

We also shouldn’t be too fixated on the results. Sometimes, reaching out is deeply appreciated. Other times, the simple act of reaching out triggers guilt or anger. While we do need to be tactful and gracious, we’re called to be more concerned with faithfulness than with results. We do the right thing even if it’s not received well. 

In summary, a maturing congregation will more and more recognize that when someone falls out of the boat, it’s not just the captain’s responsibility to recover the overboard passenger. It’s a joint effort. 

May God grant us grace to persevere in Christ—to remain in the boat, help others back aboard, and keep one another from getting tossed overboard.